Anami Grace | Made Up Life

I knew it was going to hurt before the first bite. I’d tasted the sauce. The jalapeño I’d asked last week if it wanted to come back to my house to make something beautiful with me, had shown up as a spicy kick in the salsa verde enchilada sauce I was making. But the first bite of melted cheese hit my mouth and burned with just the right level of molten level cheese.

I’d done all of the extra labor, the kind only I can actually appreciate. I’d seared the veggies, an onion, a couple cloves of garlic, and the jalapeño in olive oil. I then roasted it in the oven for longer than I should have. And left it on the counter while I went and found my soul in my sacred space.

When I came back from playing with the storm it had cooled. I tried a piece of the onion, which, had totally accidentally caramelized. So that was stupid. The onion had absorbed the spice of the jalapeño, and that my friends is the beginning of every wonderful food journey. I blended my roasted veggies with some store bought sauce and some knorr chicken bouillon and a tiny bit of cumin.

I heated up some canola oil on the stove and I flash fried the tortillas because I wanted them to better absorb the sauce, and oil is magic like that.

And then I grated half of a block of Monterey Jack Cheese, and I chopped up some white onion to put inside the enchiladas.

I cooked them until my house started to smell like the most magical place. I thought I would want more cheese on top, but I didn’t.

I stood there, and ate the first bite right out of the freshly molten oven. And I hof-hof-hof-ed it because I have absolutely no self control when it comes to hot cheese and Mexican food.

And as I did. This overwhelming bubble of life welled up within me and I started to cry in my dark kitchen while eating this volcanic enchilada.

Y’all. I learned how to help my human body do well in a capitalistic hellscape with PDA type autism. I loved myself. I accommodated my self. I created a life I love so much. I have increased the happiness threshold in my life so much that I can never settle for less than the joy of cooking myself wonderful food after a full day of helping people love themselves into beautiful lives.

My name is Anami Grace, and I realized that they didn’t sell a life in my size and color. And that everything was all made up anyway, and so. I made up a better life for myself. Which turned out to be quite the creative endeavor, and the most beautiful piece of art I’ve ever had the pleasure to hold.

I think it’s time for everyone to look beautiful in a made up life, who would like to build a you, with me?

Anyway. Love and light to you all. Take care! Bye!